It involves leaving your comfort zone, your routine, if only for a moment. Trying something new, scary, out of the ordinary, unexpected. Do as Eleanor Roosevelt said and “do something everyday that scares you.” Moving to Nashville for the summer is my change.
It started as a distant idea. Move to Nashville to intern for the summer. Make some connections in a city I had never been to before. As the date to leave grew closer, I realized I was leaving everything familiar. Faces, streets, routine. I was not continuing my regime I had perfected for the last several months. Class, Starbucks, study, rinse, repeat. I had sunken into an unsatisfactory satisfaction. Also, I was not going home: the place of ultimate comfort and ease.
Very rarely does saying goodbye affect my emotions. No tears were shed, but I couldn’t help feeling like I was abandoning my family and friends. I simultaneously felt selfish and excited about my roadtrip. Was I about to walk out on potentially growing relationships? How can I sustain those without being physically present?
As I unpacked my boxes and bags, I felt an overwhelming feeling of being alone. The words that literally ran through my mind were, “what have I done?” I have no idea where I am, both geographically and philosophically. I let fear overcome me.
After a couple days, those fears have subsided. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. The frustrating part is not knowing that reason. Will the benefits of my decision outweigh what I left behind? Perhaps this is an age old question, but it’s one that I’ve been plagued with now more than ever. As they say, truth and time tell all.
Until that time comes, I’ll continue to share my adventures in Nashville.